Sandy Beardsley
Living with a Brain Tumor
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06/29/06
Prayers Needed… The Journey Takes a Turn
Filed under: General
Posted by: Dan @ 9:13 pm

These words are hard to write…

The past week has been a bad one for Sandy. She is experiencing a major setback. At first, a couple of weeks ago, we thought she was having a reaction to the chemo drugs - fatigue, etc. But this past week has seen a steady increase in the physical problems she has been experiencing. Her peripheral vision in the left eye has gotten worse - the “blind spot” is much larger. She has lost a lot of the control of her left side - she has difficulty moving her left leg and arm. When she walks she is very unsteady and drags her left foot. Because of this, as well as the vision loss, she veers to the right when she walks. She was able to get around using hiking poles, but even that is difficult now. Her left hand is “like it belongs to someone else” as she says - difficult to grasp things, put clothes on, do the simple things we all take for granted. She has also had some headaches this week, which she has rarely had. There are also cognitive changes, more difficulty understanding and retaining things like what we are going to be doing tomorrow or what happened yesterday. This has all been unbearably frustrating for her.. and heartbreaking for me.

The past two days we talked a lot about getting an MRI for her as soon as possible, not waiting until August 1 as originally scheduled. Fortunately today we had her regular 2-week appointment with her local oncologist. Her doctor was of course very concerned about the changes in her condition since two weeks ago. She ordered an MRI immediately and the radiology people worked late to get Sandy in for her 30th MRI (yes, 30 in the past seven years), and, as usual, I held her hand and rubbed her legs during the 30-minute MRI. She and Sandy’s oncologist at Stanford also decided to put her back on Decadron, a steroid pill that reduces brain swelling. Because that is one of the possibilites - swelling from the brain tumor increasing in activity or a delayed reaction to the surgery 6 weeks ago or possible bleeding in the brain. We meet with her oncologist tomorrow (Friday) morning to learn the results of the MRI. And then we will know what is happening to her, and make decsisions on what comes next. We are praying for the best and hopeful the Decadron will ease her symptoms.

Despite this setback, we still encourage family and friends to stop by and see us anytime. Just don’t stand on Sandy’s left side - she may not see you. Our thanks to everyone for the comments, cards, visits, gifts and love that keep coming our way.

Sandy found a part of a poem she wanted me to share…

Blessed are they who make it known that I am loved,
respected and not alone.

Blessed are they who can ease the days on my journey
Home in loving ways.

           –Esther Walker

Good night,
Dan

6 Responses to “Prayers Needed… The Journey Takes a Turn”

  1. Shirl Says:
    Well damn. This news sucks big time Dan. Please give Sandy all my love, and let her know I’m with her, always. I’m praying that the Decatron (Dextameshasone) will help her. I’ve just come off mine, after 1 1/2 years since my last operation, so maybe she just needed to stay on it longer. Hopefully, this is so. Love, Shirl
  2. heather Says:
    For those Bloggers out of the area who can’t remember Sandy, Dan & Cam’s address it is: 12597 Wilson St; Leavenworth, WA 98826 For Sandy and DanO, Please know that there are major prayer horses out there with you. You may not feel them or hear from them often enough, but they are constant. Thank you for sharing what is happening, so we can pinpoint what we need to ask for. This is hard news to hear, but as Sandy has said, each moment is precious, and I must say now how precious you three have been to our lives - friends for decades, comrads in causes, deeply caring, but always with laughter and smiles, even some “kick in the butt’s” as needed. We honor you and your love for each other and for this world. Thank you. Here’s a poem that is sitting on our computer desk, it is not relevant, but it says to me “blog me please”: CONVERSATIONS CAPTURED ON A CABIN CEILING - If they have up-wrinkles, it’s from smile lines — poistive people. If they have down-wrinkles, you know what that means. - You can’t share mountain hikes iwth just anyone, they have to have the same sense of awe and wonder that you have. It’s like sharing your spirit with people who don’t care. - I dreamt 12 turkey vultures were talking with me, showing me how to fly. - Hmm, interesting, in my dream I was a fighter pilot. (October 1996, rainy weekend firewood gathering with Dick and Tina.) Sandy - you have up-wrinkles, you share mountain hikes, you dare to dream and you’re a fighter. With love and blesssings, Heather & Pat and many more
  3. Sue Rohrbacher Says:
    Sandy & Dan, You don’t know me but I have been following your story for over a year and decided it’s time to speak up. I came to your site by doing research for my own spinal cord tumor (ependymoma) which I had removed a year ago April. After much physical therapy I am doing quite well. You two sound like the most wonderful people - I wish I lived closer so I could come and give you both a hug (I’m in Delaware!) I’m praying for you and thinking of you all the time as if I know you, which I feel like I do. You are both such strong and loving and caring people - please know that there are absolute strangers out there, like me, who are sending love, thanks to your wonderful web site. Best wishes to you both. Sue
  4. Susie Steblina Says:
    Know that all of our prayers and and love are sent your way. I have not kept up with your blog this month, and am just amazed at all the glorious special moments you have generously shared with us. I write this note while tears of joy and sorrow fall. Just know you are very special in all our hearts. I hope you are using Camas. If folks are staying there the best way to keep cool is to close all windows early in the morning and then open everything up in the evening. Camas is yours for all this week. We do have renters coming Friday, July 7.
  5. Laurie Riley Says:
    Dear Sandy and Dan, Like the woman in Delaware who wrote today- we don’t know each other as closely as other teachers at Orondo school or your closer friends… but,I have been deeply touched and forever changed by your intimate sharing of real life and real challenges. I enjoyed working with Sandy in Third grade each week and marvelled at her tenacity and the respect she has for kids. It is so obvious. We have a love of life, kids, and nature in common. You have inspired me to hike again and get back into the gift of nature. I have had a family member and a niece experience serious cancers this past year and they have had miraculous outcomes and excellent care. They are Living Strong as well and anticipate beating the odds. You have been an amazing example. Dan, thank you for showing men that loving, supporting your lovely wife is a privilege no matter what the circumstance. Be assured you are in our prayers also. Thank you and with love, Laurie
  6. heather Says:
    Oh My Gosh. We love you two so much. May God keep you in the palm of her hand. Blessings. H&P

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